by Sara Wales
What is detachment? I see it as a way of pulling back so that you don’t get hurt or caught up in the drama. It is necessary when you need to protect yourself. Buddha looked at detachment as a way to protect oneself from suffering. Detachment is neither kind or unkind, it is neutral.
If you are involved with someone who has issues with addiction it is necessary to detach so that you do not get caught up and become sick with the addict. Over the past few months I have been struggling with this. There is someone I love very much who is an addict and I have had to learn to detach so that I can bring some normalcy and control back into my life. I have had to learn what I can and can not control. This is not easy and you can very easily attach again and try to fix something which is not in your control to fix. I have to keep reminding myself that I control what I say, feel and how I behave. I have had to learn what is my problem and what is not my problem. It is very easy to lose yourself when dealing with an addict. What has been very helpful to me is this quote, “You yourself as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection” ~Buddh
a In dealing with addiction I have to remember to care for myself as well, this is also very important if you are a caregiver. Caregivers tend to give the best to their patient and lose sight of caring for themselves.
On the brighterside I am thankful for the lesson I am learning and I know that this only makes me stronger. Life can be a struggle but when you pull through you can look back and see how much better you have become as a person.
~Sara
addiction Life Self help
by Sara Wales
As I travel through life I have learned through experience that the best thing you can do for peace of mind and a healthy body is to make peace with the past. It is not in our best interest to hold on to past grudges or things that make you angry or sad.
Sometimes there may not be a resolution with others but in helping yourself you have to find a way to move forward and to let it go. This is never an easy process but one of the first steps is the accept what happened and your responsibility with it. You may also have to find a way to forgive either yourself of the other person. Also try not to think or obsess about what has happened since that sucks the joy out the moment you are in now.
Sometimes it just takes time for something or someone to heal and move forward.
Remember you are doing it for yourself not someone else.
~Sara
A sunny ray to ponder Life
by Sara Wales
Over the past few weeks I have been thinking about choices. How many times do you hear someone say they “don’t have a choice”? This can refer to a job, family situation or friends. We always have a choice. We can choose to stay in a job we dislike, choose to stay with someone, choose what we want to do. People will say they don’t have a choice because it is easier to stay where they are at and not make a major move or shake things up. It is also easier to say you don’t have a choice because choosing causes you to take responsibility and accountability for your actions. When we make the decision to have a choice we give ourselves freedom and power over our actions. Think about it next time you comment that you don’t have a choice, remember that you do and that you are choosing to do something because of the consequences and outcome that it brings. Remember having a choice gives you freedom. Have a wonderful week. ~Sara
Life
by Sara Wales
In life I believe that we tend to hold on to unhealthy jobs, relationships or situations because we are fearful to move forward or unsure how to go about it. Many times we may find ourselves in a relationship that is bringing us down or it is taking all we have just to stay up. We also tend to stay in jobs where we feel miserable or under valued. A business consultant once told me that people won’t make changes until they have felt enough emotional pain. When we have reached our threshold for pain that is what will cause us to move forward and to make the necessary changes. I do believe this to be very true based on my own life and observation . I would like to encourage you to think about your situation or relationships/job. Are you just enduring or are you happy and satisfied? When we finally do move on and look back for reflection we often wish we had moved on sooner Please be forever evaluating your life and your current needs/wants. Please don’t wait until your pain threshold takes you forward, do it before you get to that point. Always evaluate and make adjustments when needed and move on when you find that you are not happy or unsatisfied.
That is my STAY POSITIVE thought for the week. ~Sara
Life
by Sara Wales
It is so important to take time out for ourselves. We live in such a busy world that sometimes we are doing so much that we ignore what our bodies are telling us. Sometimes we feel stressed, depressed or just plain overwhelmed. Take a deep breath and remember that you have needs too. Listen to what your body is telling you. Do you need some play time for yourself? Remember we need to take a break and take care of ourselves as well. Go out and do something for youself. Even if it is just for a few hours, it can make you feel refreshed, relaxed and renewed. When we feel better we are able to focus and perform at a higher level. We tend to enjoy being active and doing more when we don’t feel so tired and overwhelmed.
YOU are important, take some time for yourself.
That is my STAY POSITIVE thought for the week.
A sunny ray to ponder
by Sara Wales
Self talk is the most important communication you will ever have. Self talk effects our self confidence, self esteem, our mood and our power to accomplish things. Think about how you would talk to a child or a friend. Would you be encouraging, kind and nurturing? Do you talk to yourself that way?
I encourage you to improve your inner dialect. When you start to think I can’t say I can with a little practice, or I can if I try hard enough or I can if this is something I really want. Change the thoughts of I ‘m stupid, I’m no good to I am smart I am good. I can do it.
Find a picture of yourself as a child and really look at it. The next time you are engaged in negative self talk think of that picture of yourself and how you wouldn’t talk to a child that way so you won’t talk to yourself that way. You are a miracle, a beautiful creation, appreciate and talk kindly and encouragingly to yourself. You will boost your self esteem and confidence. You may even begin to feel better and happier.
That’s my STAY POSITIVE thought for the week.
Self help
On the Brighter Side 